The Homecoming Gang Rape - Perspective

Before I begin tearing at this subject in the usual way (which will require brutally examining the behaviors of all involved), let me clarify up front that anything I say does not excuse the perpetrators or bystanders, nor does it imply that the victim deserved this.  In the end, the victim needs all our thoughts and prayers as she begins to rebuild a shattered life, those that stood by should be haunted by the memory of their failure for years, and those who are guilty of this horrific crime should spend many many years in jail where they too may be raped.  I also have just spent hours reading on the Free Range Kids website, and I see some correlations in how we raise our children and the horrifying results that can spring from our desire to make our kids "safe."  So all this is on my mind as I write.

For those of you who have not followed the story so far, here's the local coverage.  In short, a 15-year-old girl left her homecoming dance early.  She went off with an acquaintance, allegedly to drink.  She was then assaulted, robbed, and raped over a 2-hour period, with at least four active participants in the rape.  In addition, there were at least a dozen bystanders that may have snapped pics or video of the crime.

So that brings me to things that occurred to me:

Too Much Sex, no Responsibility - One problem that led to this whole mess is our ass-backward view of sexuality.  Parents can't get the balls to talk about it, schools teach based on agendas, and every form entertainment that the naturally horny teen set seeks out is drenched in consequence-free fuckfests.   It's what I sought out when I was that age.  And with the voyeuristic nature of our current younger population (EVERYTHING'S on YoutTube), seeing some chick getting banged is not out of the realm of possibility.


The second problem is that kids are responsibility-free for the most part, relying on their parents to make the important decisions.  It's what gets kids that never really drank really blasted (and maybe drugged).  It's what lets a girl get into trouble and not see it coming., or see it coming and not worry.  It's what turns what might have been thought of as fun initially into the beginning of a violent crime.  In the end, you have kids that, when pressed with a real moral, legal, or ethicla dilemma, there's no well of experience on which to draw.  This means the base instincts take over, and judgment is damn near nonexistent.  Combine this with the amped up sex mentality, you have a recipe for disaster.

Until the videos/pics and the stories of the victim, the perps, and the witnesses are all gathered and disseminated, we're not going to know what people were seeing and why it happened the way it did

Where Were the Police? - The reason I brought up the consequence-free atmosphere of youth was because it plays into what the school officials and police did and didn't do that night.  This is found in the typical responses:

A student: “We need more security or something. I don't know. I don't think I'm going to be coming to any dances. I think I just want to move from Richmond High and go to Vista.”

A parent: “It's not safe. I think they should have more security. The people that work for security, they are not doing the right thing.”

I'm going to call BS on this attitude.  I don't do so lightly.  If they had been swarming cops over every inch of the school grounds, maybe they would have found the girl and stopped the rape sooner.  Or maybe, with the prying eyes of adults everywhere, they would have ended up miles away, and she would have died in a ditch after bleeding out for hours upon hours from her injuries as well as an attempt to cover up what had happened.

This is the reason you arm children with knowledge, not fear.  With common sense, not dismissible dogma.  Arm them as best as you can to be adults.  It may be the difference between life and death, between escape and tragedy.  Because the truth is that no amount of watching and no amount of police and no amount of GPS camera tracking of every move they make will ultimately protect them every second. 


March of the Counselors/Lawyers - Now in the rush to "deal" with the situation, there will be two relatively useless forces.

The first is the predicable bunch called counselors.  These are people whose purpose is to deal with the fragile emotions of pussified kids who heard about the violent crime and can't seem to either talk to their parents or their priest/minister/whoever or otherwise deal with anything.  There are about a dozen and a half people who might need some kind of psychological treatment.  That includes the victim (absolutely), the perps (perhaps, depending on the specifics), and the spectators (and mainly to get the whole story).  Beyond that, grow a spine and realize that horrible shit happens all the time without scarring whole populations.  And that's in countries where rape gangs roam.  It's called perspective.

Then there's the boil on the ass of tragedy, lawyers.  Not the ones who will prosecute the scumbags, and not those with the distasteful task of defending the vermin.  They are necessary.  I'm talking the assloads of lawsuits someone will bring over this because they can't accept that no one can cover everything.  Sadly, these useless creatures will descend to sue somebody just after the the counselors finish the wet nursing.  And the result is often laws that make situations worse.

Final Contemplations - Sadly, there will be lots of stories that will come out, with the most salacious of details.  We're going to hear the tragic story of the victim.  We're going to hear from the perpetrators, at least one of whom will have made a "terrible mistake" (I'm skeptical, but I'm betting it will be the story).  Much of what we will hear will trace back to the parents and families and the community.  And in the end, too many people will learn the wrong lesson from a senseless and horrible crime.