1. Start with the truth - A bold lie, in direct contradiction of facts, is easy to refute. However, when you have a fact to build on, you can reach any conclusion you want. A perfect example of this is President Obama's insistence that the "public option" in the existing government health care bills will not eliminate private insurance, and essentially create government-run health care. The initial fact is that the bill doesn't do this. However, this was the rationale given with every other medical program, that it was limited. The result, however, has been that the government gets a foot in the door, and keeps coming until it's in and it's brought friends.
2. Extrapolate a lie out of probabilities - Real science deals with facts and theories. A fact has been something that's been proven over and over and can be measured and verified by honest skeptics. It's when you take theories and pretend they're facts that they become lies. The GOP has been running with the story of end-of-life counseling. While some have chosen their phrasing carefully so that they're not lying, the idea that the end-of-life counseling is simply a method by which the government will encourage old people to die. Sorry, GOP, the bill doesn't state anything about offing old people. And while it may eventually come to that (after the government takes over everything and runs out of cash), saying that the bill says what it doesn't is at best disingenuous.
3. Find an demon and go all Buffy on it (not sexually) - It's easier to swallow lies when the people you're lying to know that there's someone out there lying to them about EVERYTHING. And with liberals, it's BIG ANYTHING! BIG CORPORATE, BIG WAL-MART (redundant, I know), BIG RETAIL, BIG OIL, BIG PHARMA, BIG FOOD, BIG MEDIA, BIG LOBBYISTS, BIG BALLS (be glad I just decided to crack a testicle joke), and for today's BIG enemy: BIG INSURANCE! *boo, boo, hiss* This requires more lies, because you have to take the misdeeds of some companies and some executives, break out a broad-assed brush, and start painting in broad brown (the color of bullshit) strokes. It's something 10-year-olds are generally good at.
The bullshittery begins with the number of representatives facing constituents who effectively boo them off the stage. In turn, you claim that it's all a ploy to derail "meaningful reform" by BIG EEEEEVIL INSURANCE COMPANIES, guided by Republican hacks and more astroturf than American Idol fandom. But when half the population opposes the plan, then maybe you should consider that the BIG EEEEEVIL INSURANCE COMPANIES, for all the "obscene, filthy, disgusting, slimy, Naziesque (misnomer) profits" they make, simply don't have the payroll to buy that many damned people off. Besides, if all insurance companies were so evil (and I admit there are bastards out there), we'd have ditched them for the government tit a long time ago.
4. Repeat - Repeat. Repeat. Repeat. Repeat. Repeat. Repeat. Repeat. Repeat. Repeat. Repeat. Repeat. Repeat. Repeat. Repeat. Repeat. Repeat. Repeat. Repeat. Repeat. Repeat. Repeat. Repeat. Repeat. Repeat. Etc.
The big lies are best served when you repeat the same words over and over. Words like crisis. As in health care crisis. Or health insurance crisis. Now while there are many problems, and they are bad in some cases, the system is sustainable for a good while longer. This means that while prompt action to fix the problems would be fantastic, there is no need to rush a solution if its potential is that it will make things worse. And a thousand-page plan that most of its proponents haven't read, that when condensed reads as a blueprint of another grabtastic clusterfuck of a government boondoggle, and that is being rushed with all of the speed of this year's Bullshit! "stimulus" package and last year's Wall Street Dastardly Bastardly Bailout, you know it's a lie that we need to do this RIGHT NOW, before babies start dying by the bushel.
But on the plus side, all the truthless blather gives me some fun.
As the head (evidenced by the kneepads) of the House and the leader of the effort to ram thorough the government health care, she's the biggest target in a collection of miscreants that are getting roundly defeated in town halls by the legions of pissed off Americans, at least until the union thugs arrive to start some shit. And shall I even detail the plan of attack coming from the White House?
Now I know dear Nancy doesn't have this problem when she goes home, being that she represents that bastion of quasi-socialist insanity, San Fransicko (and you haven't pulled the batteries out of her yet?). So the idea that she is in charge of rallying the troops to face their constituents gives me giggles and squirts in orifici I'll be kind enough not to document with pictures anywhere in this blog. Needless to say, the word hapless will most certainly apply here, though not soon enough to suit my sadistic preference.
Now poor pitiful Nancy has had herself down for asshattery for a while now. I just had to find something specific. Although, since he'd probably stick up for the scary lady, I could let fellow blogger Truth101 share the award.
Nah, he'd like that too much. Too bad. Nancy gets it this week all alone.