Thursday, March 6, 2008

Talking to Liberals

One of the truly great joys I have found is getting into intense and factual arguments with Liberals, especially those of the blogger variety. Now I know there are many conservative bloggers that have no tolerance for the dogmatic bullshit of the left. I however, have found a glimmer of intelligence and even a Barack Obama flavored drop of hope that liberals have intelligence.

I know, it's hard to imagine, liberal thought and all. But I'll humbly admit that I'm smart as hell and can recognize the stirrings of actual thought even in the most unreasonable. So as a public service to all my fellow bloggers, here is my guide to "seminar blogging" your opposition.

1. Never fight kookitude with kookitude - Whether they are infected with vegetarianism, BDS, or general delusions of utopia, most crazy libs don't subscribe to the idea of rational discourse. Instead, they unload a laundry list of all the sins committed by one man (Bush) or one group (conservative talk radio), which requires either answering the litany or cracking blowjob jokes about Clinton. And her husband. The problem with the latter is that it adds nothing to the discussion and shows no attempt at intelligence. So if you can manage it, address any tedious charges, or at the very least, point out that they don't seem to want to discuss shit.

2. Agree where there is agreement - Some people on our side, though right about many things, are really loud and annoying (Ann Coulter) and should be thrown under the bus (especially the Straight Talk Express). Others (the uber-zealots of the religious right) are easy to toss, as they are nucking futs. There are, for the most part, common things that even liberals want and need. Find these points and exploit them

3. Never surrender - It gets tiring every time they go on about how Bush stole the election, brought down the World Trade Center, started wars around the world for oil and to kill children and our soldiers, destroyed the economy, empowered the rich to destroy black people, women, and undocumented workers, and probably raped a few virgins with chainsaws while hiding on his cowboy ranch. How do you argue with that litany of shit? FACTS! Where you can find points that are cogent, address them. Where there is simply lunacy, berate them for intellectual failings.

Follow these rules and liberals will either start tearing their hair out or banning you from their blogs. Or maybe, just maybe, they will begin to discuss things reasonably. That is the purpose of SPD. So hop to it.


Toad734 said...

I agree, Ann Coulter is an ugly cunt who should be thrown under a truck or perhaps raped by Bush's chainsaw and Limbaugh is a hypocritical drug addict and Oreilly is a sexual deviant along with Ted Haggard, Mark Foley, Dan Burton, Vitter, Craig etc. And it’s always the ones who bark loudest about the sins of others who end up with cats up their asses in rest area toilet stall. That is what pisses liberals off. You say gays destroy marriage we say boning dudes in airport shitter destroys marriage, Bible belt divorce rate destroys marriage etc.

But on to your last point; sure there are people like my brother who think Bush flew the planes into the WTC with his own personal remote control and he gives our side just as bad of a name as Coulter, Limbaugh and Haggard does your side. But what fails to amaze me is how conservative are so unable to connect dots and see behind the lines. You don't realize that Reagan was one of the main reasons we have such a huge drug problem in the US, you think he's the one who started to combat drugs. You think that the revolving door of Washington Politicians and the Boards of corporations like Halliburton, Carlyle Group, Blackwater are just mere coincidences and that and oil man from Texas could never be persuaded by an oil company from Tx when it comes to where we are going to war shortly after that nation decided to suspend the sale of their oil from the dollar to the Euro. You also fail to realize that under Bush terrorism is at an all time high, extremism is at an all time high, American deaths are at a 40 year high and that Bush ignored the threats of 9/11 and it is a strange coincidence with that warning in hand that there were 4 unarmed jets patrolling the entire eastern seaboard (due to war games) on 9/11. Did Bush perpetrate the attacks on 9/11, of course not but he certainly is negligent and possibly to the point of criminally negligent.

Its this total naive trust of the government that people like Mikes America has which allows this country to be sold to the highest bidder.

Patrick M said...

1. Never fight kookitude with kookitude

You know, sometimes just mentioning kookitude brings it out:

I agree, Ann Coulter is an ugly cunt who should be thrown under a truck or perhaps raped by Bush's chainsaw and Limbaugh is a hypocritical drug addict and Oreilly is a sexual deviant along with Ted Haggard, Mark Foley, Dan Burton, Vitter, Craig etc.

Thanks, Toad, for making my point all too clear.