Friday, December 14, 2007

Happy Chrismahanukwanzakah!

Leave it to a cellphone company to get it right.

The Christmas season is upon us (and yes, it is the Christmas season) and the usual battle of December has been raging for weeks already. There are schools with everything but Christmas mentioned on calendars, city councils debating over colored lights, everybody with a religious ax to grind bitching about various things added or subtracted from various celebrations, and the obligatory cadre of lawyers ready to sue everybody from Santa to the Baby Jesus. I'm tired of this battle being waged every year. No season inspires more bad blood and lawsuits than the season of giving and goodwill. So, to cap off my discussion of religion, here's my word on the subject.

First of all, the federal holiday is Christmas. How you choose to celebrate it is up to you. If you're of a Christian persuasion, you've got the birth of Jesus. If you go secular, trot out the fat man and his reindeer. Otherwise, have a meal, do something family, sit at home naked with a bowl of Cheetos and watch A Christmas Story over and over and over again. I don't care, as long as you don't bitch about what everybody else is doing. The same principle applies to every other holiday. If you have one to celebrate, celebrate it in your own way, and respect others choice to celebrate what they want and how they want.

As for the lawyers, get out of the season! If someone wants to add a decoration, great. Baby Jesus in a manger? Strap some angels around Him and go. Santa? He didn't get dressed up for nothing. Jewish? Set your menorah next to the Baby Jesus; after all, he was a Jew. Kwanzaa? Why the hell not? The atheists and Wiccans can throw up some Winter Solstice decorations together. I'm sure there's an Islamic holiday or two somewhere in this month too. My point is that this is a season of giving and sharing. So let's all share the public space and add anything anybody wants celebrated. This season should be about inclusion, not lawsuits; about coming together, not separation. And as Seinfeld proved, there's always Festivus (for the rest of us).

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