Thursday, January 1, 2009

New Year's Revolution (Sounds Better Than Resolutions)

Well, it's officially 2009 all over the world. Had some adult beverage, although not champagne, as I didn't want to buy a bottle for me and have the rest to throw away or cook with. Plus, as I had to bed the kids (and clean up much puke from a sour-stomached toddler) before settling in front of the computer and TV, there wasn't much point to excessive consumption. And I wrote this after midnight, then went to bed (but won't post until 2009 all over the world). Yeah, that's how I spent last year. And how I'll probably spend next year.

Unless I get my ass in gear and pursue some serious revolution. I'd just say resolutions, but resolutions are pretty much dog shit that people will forget before Obama drops the oath. Which, as I think about it will probably go like this:

I, uh, Barack Hussein Obama, um, do solemnly, uh, swear that, um, I, uh, will, uh, faithfully execute, um, the office of, uh, President of the, um, United States, and, uh, will to the, um, best of my, uh, ability, preserve, um, protect, uh, and defend the, um, Constitution of the, um, United, uh, States, uh, so help me, um, uh, uh, um, God.

Which brings me to the resolutions:

In my personal life, I'm resolving to do three things. 1. Lose 20 pounds, as my blood pressure and health will be 100% better if I can drop my lazy bloat. I'd have started sooner, but there's no point trying to start over Thanksgiving and Christmas. 2. dedicate myself to more exercise, both physical (for the weight and health) and mental (which means more blogging on all three blogs). 3. Get a date, as I am sorely lacking in companionship. Of course, I'll have to administer a writing test prior to a date, as I don't need another brainless adult child to take care of.

Okay, now to the political. There are many things that I will be employing over the next year. But to maintain the high standards that I am proudly, greatly, and humbly (stop the gagging, folks) known for, I will put forward these resolutions:

1. I will be respectful to the office of President and to the man that will hold that office. Now I won't hold back in criticizing the shit out of our president, but I will remember all the vile shit that was flung at Bush and will do my best to be respectful. I will allow myself the exception for mockery and Asshat of the Week, mainly because that's for some laughs and laughs come from the ridiculous.

2. I will have no loyalty to the GOP, only to conservative principles. Admittedly, this is easier in an off year, because I don't have to choose the lesser of two evils in an election. But there's no reason to hold back now. So it's time to eliminate the liberals from the GOP. For clarification, if it's just a disagreement (mainly on a social issue), that's one thing. But expanding the federal government is verboten.

3. I will rededicate myself to coming up with and promoting good ideas rather than tearing down the stupid ideas coming out of Washington. I may not always succeed, especially when my idea is to just say no (like with bailout mania). But a positive focus on ideas, as opposed to just Barry bashing, is the key to turning the current administration, the GOP, and the country back toward more conservative principles.

Now as most all of you will not be able to judge how badly I've hozed my personal resolutions, I leave it to you to judge over the next few months whether I'm keeping to them or deserving of giving myself the Asshat of the Week award.

So share a resolution or two that you will keep, and we'll kick this year off right.


Private Line said...

Happy New Year ........Go Israel

Robert said...

Happy New Year, Patrick!

I like the #2. I also have no loyalty to the GOP, jsut to conservative principles. I would be more than happy to pledge my loyalty to them, but they left me out in the cold somewhere around 1995.

We should remain postive...mud slinging and finger pointing from us is as bad as it is from them. We have to forge a new way to approach challenges and problems.

Over at CC we refuse to be drawn into the normal "conservative" blog mentality of throwing stones. We have our own house to fix...

Satyavati devi dasi said...

Happy New Year~!

This year I'd like to have some revolutions in my japa chanting (quality and consistency), in my diet n exercise (actually just doing either is revolutionary) and to revolutionize the state of my bass playing, meaning to actually structure practice time instead of just jamming that gets me nowhere in an orderly fashion.

Of course I will continue to do my best to throw a monkey wrench your way whenever you come up with some silly idea. So I'll be a busy girl.


Beth said...

I resolved a few years ago not to make New Year's resolutions anymore, and that has been the one resolution I have been able to keep!

Best wishes to you in 2009 Patrick!

Gayle said...

Happy New Year, Patrick. I wish you luck finding an intelligent adult companion. :)

I made one New Year's resolution that will be very easy to keep: I've promised to treat Obama fairer than the libs have treated President Bush. Most New Year's Eve promises only get broken, but this one will be so easy I don't see how I can go wrong!

Frasypoo said...

Amen to all that!
Found you on "I love Life "and had to visit.

PS:Always good to look for a woman on the internet.I found my husband that way!

Shaw Kenawe said...

I don't make resolutions, since by January 23, I find I either forget them or am bored with them.

But I will TRY to read more books.

[I just bought six this week!--I received a Border gift card for Xmas.]

Here they are:

"Plato and a Platypus Walk into a Bar...--Understanding Philosophy Through Jokes" by Thomas Cathcart and Daniel Klein

"Presidential Courage"--Brave Leaders and How They Changed America 1789-1989" by Michael Beschloss

"Summer for the Gods"--The Scopes Trial and America's Continuing Debate Over Science and Religion" by Edwaard J. Larson, winner of the Pulitzer Prize in History

"Visual Shock"--A History of Art Controversies in American Culture" by Michael Kammen, Pulitzer Prize winner.

"The Little Book of Atheist Spirituality" by Andre' Comte-Sponville

"The Portable Atheist--Essential Readings for the Nonbeliever," Selected writings by Christopher Hitchens.

Best wishes for a healthy and peaceful 2009 to all.

Satyavati devi dasi said...


Have you ever read 'Pooh and the Philosophers'??

Shaw Kenawe said...

I have the Tao of Pooh.

Obob said...

Read more or finish books
lose a few pounds because loaded fries is sooooo good
get a "h" & "j" back on my keyboard
love more
attack more
live more
die less

Patrick M said...

Private: Any guess on how many bad guys they'll blow up before the world whines too loud and stops them?

Robert: I'll try to restrict my slinging to the asshat posts over the weeked, where I plan to make people laugh at the dumb...

Beth: you're no fun. :)

Gayle: Here's how you'll break it: You won't laud adoration onto all the "good" that Obama will do, thus be branded evil, hateful, racists, blah, blah, blah....

Frasypoo: Considering every woman I've found so far is either married, a different generation, and/or several states away, it's not that likely. Kids are baggage when your available pool to select from is hours away at best.

Shaw: That's why I made ones I'm sure to keep (except the personal ones involving women). The blog ones already fit with my mission here, and the personal ones support that and reducing the bloat that I feel post-holidays.

Good Reading.

Saty: You would have to bring an animal named after a piece of shit into this, wouldn't you. :)

Obob: Worthy and fun goals. Except for the dying less. That one just takes all the fun out of it.

Beth said...

Okay, how about a resolution to read your blog everyday, and twice on Sundays?

Anonymous said...

My resolution is to see Israel beat the crap out of Hamas! Boo Freaken Hoo for Hamas, and the Palestinians,and the rest of these Arabs!!! Lets remember 9-11 and these people dancing in the streets!

Patrick M said...

Beth: That'll work, if I can get to producing in 2009.

Stones: Haven't forgot. As long as people are out to see us die, I don't mind seeing the ground covered with their corpses.

Arthurstone said...

Throwing Stones:

2008, 2009. 'Patriotic', 'conservative' values never seem to go out of date.

Always a good year for killing Arabs!


Patrick M said...

Arthur: It's not about killing Arabs. It's about killing terrorists. And the solution to dealing with people that want to kill you is to kill all of them.

That the majority of terrorists are irritated by sand in their ass crack in addition to the continued existence of the US of A is irrelevant.

The only relevant thing is that they die.

Arthurstone said...

Throwing Stones typed:

'and the rest of these Arabs!!! Lets remember 9-11 and these people dancing in the streets!'

Arthurstone wondered:

Always a good year for killing Arabs!

PatrickM chimed in:

Arthur: It's not about killing Arabs. It's about killing terrorists.

Actually Patrick it's worse than just killing Arabs. It's killing 'these people dancing in the streets' and in too many cases in Gaza recently, killing those too young to have even been born when the crimes of 9-11 occurred.

Better to kill them before they dance.

Patrick M said...

Arthur: It's killing 'these people dancing in the streets'....

Yeah. That's how you identify them.

Better to kill them before they dance.

I like the way you think.

Arthurstone said...

PatrickM typed:

'I like the way you think'

No you don't.

That statement was meant ironically. Always a problem on the internet tubes.

I don't wish quite as many people dead as you.

Patrick M said...

Arthur: Why take it ironically when it's so much more fun to take it at face value. :)

And the only people I wish dead are people that want me dead.