Post-election Blogging Computer Tuneup

Ok, I don't know about all of you (especially you Obamatons), but I'm burnt out enough to need a break from politics.

Now one thing I saw in the various blogs over the past few months was the standard issues of computers getting gunked up, computers crashing, and all the fun shit that makes blogging both challenging and barely possible at times. So I'[m going to take off the pundit hat (and whatever articles of clothing are chafing) and give you my sagelike tech advice.

disclaimer: You assume all risk taking advice from me. But I use or have used pretty much every program I'm going to list, and free programs are good! But if you have any issues, that's what Windows system restore is for. And remember, you can drop me an email if the fit hits the shan. And you have another computer working. I's all about personal responsibility people!

Browsers - For the uninitiated, this category begins with the obscenity called Internet Explorer (aka Idiot Exploder, IE for short). I know some of you that come here to peruse use IE 7. There are even people running IE6. This is scary. IE is such a part of windows that any virus that hits windows can exploit it. You know that thing about putting all your eggs in one basket? It applies to software. Abandon all Microsoft if possible beside your operating system.

Instead, my preferred browser is Mozilla's Firefox. This is actually the second Firefox post I did (the first being on Firefox 3's release day). It's faster, cleaner, more secure, and magnicifently customizable, and a version of it will work on every Windows, Mac OS, and Linux platform out there. And if you don't like it, there's always IE (the John Murtha of browsers) to fall back on.

Speaking of customization, there is one must-have addon: IE tab, which lets you render the rare page that only works with Idiot Exploder. Beyond that, just try anything that flips your dinger.

And if you're not Firefox-inclined (MIKE!!!), there are others browsers out there like Opera, Apple's Safari (which iTunes tries to sneak in), and Google Chrome (which is in beta, but that means nothing when Google's involved).

Email - If you're using Outlook Express (OE) or Windows Mail (Vista), it's like salting a rectal boil. You're just asking for pain. Thus, as IE has OE, Mozilla's Firefox is complemented by Thunderbird. At least it's worth a try before your emails go bye bye.

Antivirus - If you're on your computer, reading this and you don't have an updated antivirus, you may be an Obama voter and you definitely need to be hit in the head with a hammer. If you have an expired pay antivirus, delete that shit (it's probably Norton) and download AVG Antivirus. I have the free version on one computer and the paid (because I didn't have to) on the other. It's the best and brightest free antivirus out there. If you're still running an older machine (Windows 98 or ME), I'd recommend Avast! Antivirus, which is what I have on the kids computer. And for those of you who aren't sure and need an online scan (including Mac users!!!), theres Trend Micro's Housecall. Although, if you run Windows, the online scan is no substitute!

Spyware - I have three programs for you here. Ad-Aware 2008 is the easier one to use, and Spybot Search and Destroy is the more comprehensive one (as in cool things it can do (unless you're a noob!)). Download at least one, if not both. The third one, Malwarebytes Anti-Malware is a trial version, but it will kill the fake antivirus programs, like XPantivirus2008 (pic or the devil to the right) and variants. I haven't had a chance to use it yet, but if you get one of those shitware programs, it seems to kill it.

Firewall - Firewalls can be tricky. They block stuff very easily, require some tinkering if you do more than surf, blog and email, and thus in my job I don't recommend them. If you have a router in your home network, it already has an firewall built in. And if you don't go to dangerous sites, search things that can lead to bad sites, don't download porn, mp3's, or other peer-to-peer shared files (all of which I have done), and keep all your other security programs updated, then that's enough. If you're like me however, you download a software firewall. One computer uses the firewall in the paid (not by me) version of AVG, but my primary computer (on which I blog and do all the dangerous stuff) runs Zone Alarm. However, as I've personally run into two computers that don't like it, my suggestion for a second firewall would be Comodo Firewall. A caution, though. If you do go with a firewall, it is often the source of some problem or another at some point, but I wouldn't have it any other way.

Parental Control - If those of you that comprise my Christian reading base (narrow because I make drunk sailors blush) are paying cash for filtering software, shame on you. Especially when you have me around. I have two things to recommend. First, assuming you have the sense to have downloaded Firefox and your kids are still young enough not to try hacking the computer to check out tits, you're in luck. After my son started randomly typing in letter (like KKK) to a Google search, I had to throw up some filtering. Fast. Five minutes later, I found and installed FoxFilter, a nice little addon for Firefox. Now if you are an IE infidel, or you don't trust your kids that far, there's K9 Web Protection. It does lock up the whole computer rather than just one or two user profiles, but that's the price you pay if you're a cheap bastard trying to protect your kids.

Other programs - If you open up your add/remove programs (programs and features in vista), you're likely to find the beast that is Adobe Reader. Delete that shit and download Foxit Reader. It does the same thing, but is not bloatware.
For word processing, death to Microsoft Office, especially when there's Open Office. I have yet to find anything that it can do that Microsofts overpriced POS can do. And of course, I have to mention the sister to our beloved Blogger (kissing ass to please the Google overlords), Google Docs. You log in and the shit is there. And it exports to Open Office.

Help for the comments section - Since I see this often, I'll add help Ive given people before in posting links in the comments section. It requires learning a little HTML, unless you want to use Google Docs to do this. I do have to use Google Docs to create the example though.

To create bold text you type <b>bold text</b>
To create italics text you type <i>italics text</i>
And typing <a href="http://www.fairtax.org/" >a link to the FairTax</a> results in a link to the FairTax.

Final Word - If you know of any programs I've missed and you think should be included, let me know. I'm probably going to have to put a permanent link somewhere on the sidebar for easy reference. Any questions later, either drop a comment or email me at patrickmspeaks@gmail.com.

Now let me recover enough to get all political on you again next week!